Category Archives: Just thinking

Rate my poem

I wrote this poem in 2004 and registered it in the summer on Poetry.com. Now they send me lots of emails of adoration and for only $59.95 I can have a leather-bound edition of the book it will be published in if I would only damm well agree to have it included, which I haven’t. I’m saving it. 

However, if you rate it for me and I win, I might get an Apple iPod, which is probably the one Santa forgot…he always forgets one good little boy or girl every year and sadly this year it was me. Oh well, good things come to those who wait and pray hard.

Here’s the link. I expect complete honesty in your rating, my friend:  http://www.poetry.com/voteforme/poemvote1.asp?PID=12323074

Happy New Year everyone…


Bhuta Shuddhi

The cleansing of the body to prepare the mind for meditation. Not to be undertaken by novices to yoga or tantra. Why didn’t I find this article earlier? It rose to the surface when I cleansed the top of my dishwasher. We all have a spot where the comings and goings of life collect and take root until we get tired of looking at it and sweep it clean. I think it appropriate this particular article landed on the top of the pile of yoga handouts. Life is no accident. Messages are all around us. We don’t fail to understand, we fail to notice.


How to become a slut…

I laugh every time I see that in my search results.  Thought I’d share.

When I was growing up, a family from Montreal moved next door. I remember it well. All the street kids were playing some silly game and we got up the nerve to ask for the new girl. We assumed she was our age because she looked very young. Turned out she was a few years older and smoked, wore her lighter in a leather lighter pouch around her neck. How cool was that? She also wore Lois jeans, only available in Montreal at the time. In fact, I don’t think I’ve ever seen them on anyone else. I don’t remember her older brother being there right away, but when he arrived, he arrived big and became a great friend too. 

Their house had someone for everyone at ours. Their grandmother and my mother became very close and their Dad secretly idolized my sister after the day she wore her panties over her jeans as a sociology experiment. And, their mom took care of us. In fact, their parents were ideal. Fun, relaxed and absorbed enough in their own lives to let us live ours. Between our two houses, we did a lot of growing up.  You can’t see this but I’m smiling from the memories.

I think it was 1994 when their Dad died suddenly. The family stayed for a few years after that, with the brother building the house his father designed on the lot next door.  Eventually, they all moved away. My girlfriend beat cancer twice and is living strong. I saw her tonight, for the first time in years, at her Mom’s wake.

Remember, your life doesn’t end until there’s no one left to remember you. 


Post #201

I hit the 200 mark and didn’t even realize it. I think this may be a milestone. Just returned from my work Christmas party. What a bunch of fun people I landed with. I hope I can keep up. One night I’ll hang out with them but not tonight, the hockey rink fun begins at 6:30.

I have one question, and I’m sure I’m not the only one pondering this.

What music do they play to warm up the audience at an AC/DC concert? First correct response takes it and I’ll assume you’re correct since I’ve never been to an AC/DC concert.


Toothbrushes…

The other day I woke to hear a story of a family who had nothing. The kids’ letters to Santa were simple. They wanted new toothbrushes for Christmas. They learned in school about the importance of dental care and their greatest wish was to participate in this activity.

And I’m wondering what to get my f*cking dog. (Which today feels like ink remover for my couch and carpet.  Apparently she hasn’t yet mastered the essence of penmanship.)

I remember the story of this family as I shop for the people I love. I feel as if I should make a donation to a charity on their behalf. Now that’s a good idea, don’t you think?


Dust covers everything

So I assume since I’m not taking my time painting the bathroom, that something wonderful is on its way and I’m simply making myself available for it.  I am an optimist with a narrow streak of gulable and a mild affinity for skepticism. Keeps me happy, safe and hopeful.

A few tidbits have been rolling around lately. Here they are in no particular order of significance to me or any other person, living or dead:

If you kick that dead horse long enough, eventually you’ll get glued to it. Have I said that before?

Someone should stand up and tell all the bad people they are being bad, maybe they just don’t know.

Santa’s naughty list DOES NOT exist but a jigger-jagger bogger boger does. I bought two yesterday at the Freak Lunch Box and I’m going back for the big round lollipops.

Yesterday I liked one less person than I like today.

Everyone is lovable as long as they brush their teeth.

Someone once told me they liked being with me. Guess what? I do too, but I’m still here.

Once you name your guitar, you can leave it in your car for two days without it turning on you.

How long do dogs live? Mandy will be 10 next year. She still seems like a puppy to me. Should I be cherishing her even more?

Neither of my kids are feeling well today and I think KD is angry with me for not having the right cough medicine.

Homeopathic and herbal remedies are better for you than Red#6.

Drugstore dust masks are useless.


Athletic? When?

In the distance two deer crossed four lanes of highway, one stopping mid way to wait for the other. So free and alive. They were friends or maybe doe and fawn, it was difficult to tell. The scene brought freedom to my soul. I do hope they escape the savage bulletry of the season. That is my wish for them as a thank you for sharing their beauty with me.

Overhead an eagle flew, landing in a low-lying tree to devour its nourishment before soaring steadily upward. A powerful metaphor for our setbacks and disappointments in life, filling us with hope and strength for the future.

These natural moments, if we choose to experience them, are powerful. Strong enough to erase bad first meetings with people who aren’t exactly as they describe themselves and assume you are ready to go the distance, just by showing up.


The good advice continues

Funny man Jeff Mac over at Manslations has once again answered one of my questions. Be warned, if you click through, you will learn some things about me you probably didn’t particularly want to know. Having said that, I still think I’m pretty normal, just more honest and open in this completely public forum.

Doesn’t it feel like Christmas? I love that feeling. I remember that’s how I described how I felt when my husband and I were first married. Back before being Santa Claus was so expensive.


Sleep helps everything

It’s been a busy week or so and my writing practice made it to abandoned status. I’m wrapping up my current job and heading for new opportunities on November 5.  Although endings aren’t easy and decisions sometimes difficult, I can hear Louise Hay in my ear. “You are never stuck. You can always make another decision.” This thought alone removes any in-trepidation toward change. Actually, I have no fear with this move, just positive thoughts of opportunistic doors. 

Have you ever been to one of those Superstore cooking nights? I suggest you go. The martini girls’ October soiree featured live cooking by a professional, very entertaining chef named Chris Burton. The food was plentiful and delicious and it was a relaxing good time at an affordable price. We even had time to catch up on all the delicious details we can’t wait to share each month. I’d do it again. It would make a great date for new or seasoned couples.

I won four free tickets to a local Yuk Yuks comedy club last week on Facebook. What an awesome, totally random gift that was. Live stand-up is one of my favourite things and it was a great lineup. The headliner was from Alberta. Very funny guy. It was last week, so I don’t remember his name, but he was tall and I think he had a manic ex named Sherrilyn who he referred to in dark but funny light.

Friday night I was honoured to be offered a seat at Orange Crush, the Mocean Dance annual fund-raising gala. They unveiled their new website and the performances were outstanding. I was mesmerized. Actually, it made me want to do 300 sit-ups and 6000 leg presses. Funny, compelling, emotional and energizing. Oh and did I mention, completely entertaining. I would definitely pay to see them again.

KD (my older son) played his first hockey game on Sunday (at 7:00 am). He was so excited. He almost got a break away but the whistle blew and he fell over…it was right there though…next time. He lamented that I didn’t wave to him when he was on the bench, right after he gave me sneers for not picking the right pose for his school picture. He’s moving into a new stage. I need drugs. 

I’m noticing that my kids are treating me disrespectfully lately, especially KD. “If you don’t let me do this…(insert something weird here)….I’ll hate you forever.” My response is, “I’ll love you forever and the answer is still no.” I’m not sure what to do about this, except try to keep from losing my temper and reminding him that girls don’t like it when boys speak badly to their mothers because they think they will speak badly to them too. At least that’s how I feel, and I’m a girl. Of course, a Mommy’s boy isn’t where it’s at either, but it’s better than being mean to the person who brought you into the world, unless she’s a “boy’s Mommy” and then sometimes you need to be cruel to be kind…a little bit. Makes me want to be more patient with my mother too. The lessons we teach are often the lessons we need.

I’m overtired, extremely. Way too many worthy late nights and too much going on. My teeth are clenched, my shoulders are stiff and my neck is in knots. I had a panic attack last week. Woke up to my heart pounding out of control. I used the hummingbird breath and it worked like a charm 1 or 2 minutes was all it took. Stress is bad. Stress is bad. 

But, I got my braces off this morning…so I’ve got some pearly whites happening. I’ve been smiling at myself all day. Once again, I’m very entertaining in traffic.

Oh and my kids are enjoying Sunday School. I couldn’t be more pleased. KD prays for money and JB prays for Mommy, Daddy and sleep. Me too buddy.


Kudos to Jeff Mac

Jeff at Manslations answered my question yesterday. I’m thrilled with the response. This guy is FUNNY and oh so right on. See if you agree.

I was gmailing a friend tonight and noticed an alarming ad: Be A Player. Learn how to be a player and get more women. It’s strange how women are trying to side-step these guys (for the most part) and gain self-confidence while there are people making money trying to teach men how to become one. I’m not sure I’ve seen an ad for how to become a slut, but I should try gmailing this term to myself to see what comes up.

One strange search term recently is Mandy Barker. My Mandy barker is sleeping on my couch, shedding DNA from her well rounded physique. To date she hasn’t played hockey nor launched a clothing line, although if she did it would definitely be fur-lined.