Tomorrow I will sit by your grave and miss your physical presence; yet, you’ll be there, because you are everywhere. I cling to the comfort of knowing we are all one. It’s not just your memory that keeps me going but the understanding that I don’t ever have to say goodbye — for there is no separation. You know the truth, the beautiful, loving truth that we all will one day.
I lament that I can’t call you and tell you my shit and hear your little giggle and supportive sighs. In consolation, I become silent and still and feel you within me.
The heather plant I’ve been nurturing all spring and summer is ready and I will be leaving it with you as a birthday present. Like our entwined spirit, it’s an evergreen and spreads with reckless abandon. Perhaps it will make its way to Dad.
Love is the only reality, it survives everything. The rest is a dream we participate in.
Oh, and I think there will be cake, there’s always cake. This year it will be moist with our tears.
I love you so much.