Clean shaven with short hair, he looked young and straight. Attempts at small talk received only grunts, or silence with narrowing stares. He felt like a cop in a crack house. Making his way to the back of the room, he saw a familiar face. “I know you,” said a young-looking woman with a broad smile. “What are you doing here?” she asked. He walked by. He didn’t answer. He didn’t know.
Gathering
life gathers faith
and faith spreads hope
hope gathers desire
and desire spreads passion
passion gathers love
and love spreads peace
Coldful
I don’t think I’ve ever had a chest cold before. I probably have but denied it. This time it’s for real and it’s not getting better. I’m all freaked out and I’m going to bed (to sleep). I’m not reading any books or any work stuff or watching tv or thinking. I’m just going to bed. It’s 6:45 pm and right after I wash the dishes, feed my dog, tidy up the house, call my sister and have a bath, I’m going to bed.
Lumps in the sand
The night was too dark for a full moon. The world seemed unfamiliar. Her mind was unable to reason, her eyes unable to focus. Her bare feet were planted squarely in the sand, up to her ankles. Her cold bare shoulders shivered, her neck stiffened. She was afraid, she was confused. Suddenly a loving presence formed a cocoon around her. She silently succumbed to its embrace. “Come back to bed,” a voice whispered, “you’re in the kitty litter.”
Lighten up
I fear that life is getting too serious. Tomorrow is girls night. Dinner and conversation. The real good kind that makes you glad to be someone’s friend. This will shake the serious out. The reservation is under Pitt.
I’m a grandmother
My kids discovered Build-a-Bear yesterday when their cousin had his birthday party there. We now have a police officer named Cutie and a baby in jammies named Gaga, Snuggly Baby Bear. Gaga also has a stroller and Cutie has black patent leather boots, thanks to Nanny.
I am amazed at the popularity of this workshop-based marketing scheme. Kids love making the bears, holding the foot peddle while the stuffing goes in, hugging them till they are just right and then fluffing and brushing them to snuggly perfection. After the hearts are in and the strings are tied, it’s time to rid Mom and Dad of their savings.
The store is filled with little bear outfits and accessories, some priced higher than I pay for my kids clothes. But, you can’t put a price on a good time and that’s what this was.
One would expect girls to be all over this of course, but I’m amazed at how the boys take to it. It’s heartwarming to witness how serious they are about creating and loving this new pal, who comes complete with a personalized birth certificate to make it authentically theirs. They can even register their bear in case it ever gets lost. Lots of email contact comes from that I bet.
The feminine nurturing quality that’s being instilled in these little boys is touching and I think that’s a good thing. Perhaps Build-a-Bear is contributing to world peace, one little furry friend at a time. My kids adopted their bears as kids…they will be great dads someday.
While my 3 year old was having Gaga, Snuggly Baby Bear’s strings tied off, they found a knot and had to remove the pre-strung thread and sew it by hand. He was distraught. He felt he had done something to hurt his bear. He sobbed uncontrollably and we stayed close-by while Gaga underwent his operation. Still, today and tonight he lamented that he may have caused the knot. He wondered too, while only his bear had the knot. I better ask a psychologist about this sometime.
I must admit I enjoy that my kids can dress themselves now and then and give me a break to do some Mommy things. So today I sort of resented being catapulted back in time, dressing teddy bears. At least they don’t wear diapers or wet the bed. Obviously I’m not ready to be a grandmother yet.
It was worth every penny to witness their interactions as they played the “Mom and Dad and kid game”. Build-a-Bear, I’m sure we’ll be back.
A new website
Last night I was reading my email. My five year old snuck out of bed and came downstairs. He said to me, “Mom, wwwILoveYou.ca .”
The dog’s still here
Mandy is doing well. The peanut butter thing is a charm. Tomorrow she gets a bigger Kong and a some other yummy substances for it.
My day started earlier than usual and ran later than expected. I was prepared for an accident somewhere in the house. I haven’t found it…yet. She didn’t bark when I came in the door. She did bark, however, when I pulled up. She’s just excited.
I’m sure the neighbours were outside today. I’ll ask tomorrow for an update on the noise level inside my house.
The walk was a little pully again. I noticed she barks at motorcycles, bicycles, diesel engines, buses, the odd minivan and some runners. I can’t determine the significant qualifying factor that’s common among this group of agitants.
Retraining Day 5: Barking contained in the house when I’m home.
Solidify
I’m feeling like a child
and wondering what to do
the earth is spinning faster
my dreams are coming true
A sense of what can be
overflows my soul
the light that’s growing brighter
solidifies my role.
Tired
Every time I’m faced with a career dilemma, I receive a call from someone who requires my freelance services. That’s telling me something. Lately I’ve been referring callers to a friend of mine whom I trust. It’s not that I don’t want the work. Sometimes the timing is just not right or the work is too much for me to handle on a part-time basis. Tonight I said yes, because it’s right. I felt it. Or should I say, I didn’t feel that I shouldn’t. I’m trusting my intuition, it’s not wrong. I’m opening up and I like where it’s taking me. Struggling with my intuition makes me tired, following it fills me with confidence and strength.
It may be a post-39 thing. My post-39 friends agree, just be quiet and listen. The answers will come. Perhaps I’m simply experiencing the wisdom of the ages. I love it!
I’ve subscribed to a new magazine called More. I like celebrating the freedom, confidence and the license to deny that comes with being at least 4 decades old. I must admit, I hid the cover a bit at the sushi restaurant when I took it from my bag. When I left, however, I flashed it around proudly. I feel strong, a little tired, but strong.
Just a Moment 